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Author Topic: Babylon Bee  (Read 91069 times)

Angel Eyes

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #325 on: November 16, 2023, 02:05:05 PM »
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"... and now I want to hand it over to the president of Ukraine who has as much courage as he has determination.  Ladies and gentlemen, President Putin."
                          - Joe Biden, July 11, 2024

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #326 on: November 16, 2023, 02:19:00 PM »
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“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”
― William F. Buckley

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

RocketMan

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #327 on: November 17, 2023, 09:32:56 AM »
Quote from: WLJ on November 16, 2023, 02:19:00 PM
President Xi Arrives To Inspect Newest Chinese Colony
https://babylonbee.com/news/president-xi-arrives-to-inspect-his-colony-in-the-americas

Sometimes I wonder if the writers at BB know things about the future that we don't.
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If there really was intelligent life on other planets, we'd be sending them foreign aid.

Conservatives see George Orwell's "1984" as a cautionary tale.  Progressives view it as a "how to" manual.

My wife often says to me, "You are evil and must be destroyed." She may be right.

Liberals believe one should never let reason, logic and facts get in the way of a good emotional argument.

Angel Eyes

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #328 on: November 17, 2023, 01:32:28 PM »
Quote from: RocketMan on November 17, 2023, 09:32:56 AM
Sometimes I wonder if the writers at BB know things about the future that we don't.

They're just observing the present.
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"... and now I want to hand it over to the president of Ukraine who has as much courage as he has determination.  Ladies and gentlemen, President Putin."
                          - Joe Biden, July 11, 2024

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #329 on: November 18, 2023, 04:41:38 PM »
Chick-Fil-A Adds Tire Rotation, Oil Change, Car Wash, Tax Service To Drive-Thru Lanes
https://babylonbee.com/news/chick-fil-a-adds-tire-rotation-oil-change-car-wash-tax-service-to-drive-thru-lanes
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“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”
― William F. Buckley

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

Perd Hapley

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #330 on: November 18, 2023, 08:16:25 PM »
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Can the liberties of a nation be thought secure when we have removed their only firm basis, a conviction in the minds of the people that these liberties are the gift of God?
--Thomas Jefferson

HankB

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #331 on: November 18, 2023, 09:44:38 PM »
Quote from: Perd Hapley on November 18, 2023, 08:16:25 PM
I don't get it.
Chick-Fil-A is notorious for long drive-through lines. So if you're going to be there anyway, you may as well get some work done.
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Trump won in 2016. And again in 2024. Democrats haven't been so offended since Republicans came along and freed their slaves.
Sometimes I wonder if the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on, or by imbeciles who really mean it. - Mark Twain
Government is a broker in pillage, and every election is a sort of advance auction in stolen goods. - H.L. Mencken
Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it. - Mark Twain

K Frame

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #332 on: November 20, 2023, 09:05:39 AM »
Long lines, but Jesus Chik'n moves those lines faster than anyone else.

We had a fire drill at our one office the other week. Had us outside for quite awhile because they were doing inspections, as well.

When we went back in they had CFA chicken and sausage biscuits for us.

I'm still not sure why CFA biscuits are so freaking popular. They're OK, but they're no better, really, than the ones McDonald's has.
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Dogs are our link to paradise. They don’t know evil or jealousy or discontent. To sit with a dog on a hillside on a glorious afternoon is to be back in Eden, where doing nothing was not boring—it was peace. — Milan Kundera


The gift which I am sending you is called a dog, and is in fact the most precious and valuable possession of mankind
-- Theodorus Gaza

Angel Eyes

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #333 on: November 27, 2023, 02:26:45 PM »
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"... and now I want to hand it over to the president of Ukraine who has as much courage as he has determination.  Ladies and gentlemen, President Putin."
                          - Joe Biden, July 11, 2024

Hawkmoon

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #334 on: November 27, 2023, 07:41:47 PM »
Quote from: HankB on November 18, 2023, 09:44:38 PM
Chick-Fil-A is notorious for long drive-through lines. So if you're going to be there anyway, you may as well get some work done.

At work, we currently have an application from the local Chick-fil-A to replace the canopy over their drive-thru window. The work will require closing down the drive-thru for the duration (unspecified) of the construction process. The line, especially at lunch time, is always insanely long and the restaurant is on a very busy road that is a numbered state highway (not limited access). So we asked them to submit a traffic plan so we could have some assurance that the line wouldn't spill over onto the state road and create more of a traffic headache than we already have.

After two MONTHS of silence, we finally had a response last week that said (paraphrased), "We're not adding any parking so what's the problem? Can we have our permit now?"

Ummm . . . no. How about answering the question?
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100% Politically Incorrect by Design

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #335 on: November 28, 2023, 03:07:53 PM »
Disney Awarded Defense Contract After Producing More Bombs Than Lockheed Martin
https://babylonbee.com/news/disney-awarded-dod-contract-after-making-more-bombs-than-lockheed-martin
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“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”
― William F. Buckley

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #336 on: November 28, 2023, 03:08:55 PM »
« Last Edit: November 28, 2023, 05:00:29 PM by WLJ »
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“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”
― William F. Buckley

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #337 on: November 29, 2023, 09:19:01 AM »
Chick-fil-A, Buc-ee's, Hobby Lobby Merge To Form Most Popular Store Of All Time
https://babylonbee.com/news/chick-fil-a-buc-ees-hobby-lobby-merge-to-form-most-popular-store-of-all-time
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“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”
― William F. Buckley

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

MechAg94

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #338 on: November 29, 2023, 09:49:10 AM »
Quote from: WLJ on November 29, 2023, 09:19:01 AM
Chick-fil-A, Buc-ee's, Hobby Lobby Merge To Form Most Popular Store Of All Time
https://babylonbee.com/news/chick-fil-a-buc-ees-hobby-lobby-merge-to-form-most-popular-store-of-all-time
But will it be open on Sunday?
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“It is much more important to kill bad bills than to pass good ones.”  ― Calvin Coolidge

Brad Johnson

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #339 on: November 29, 2023, 09:50:44 AM »
Quote from: MechAg94 on November 29, 2023, 09:49:10 AM
But will it be open on Sunday?

Yes, but only every other hour.

Brad
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It's all about the pancakes, people.
"And he thought cops wouldn't chase... a STOLEN DONUT TRUCK???? That would be like Willie Nelson ignoring a pickup full of weed."
-HankB

Angel Eyes

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #340 on: November 30, 2023, 06:03:22 PM »
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"... and now I want to hand it over to the president of Ukraine who has as much courage as he has determination.  Ladies and gentlemen, President Putin."
                          - Joe Biden, July 11, 2024

Hawkmoon

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #341 on: November 30, 2023, 09:27:47 PM »
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100% Politically Incorrect by Design

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #342 on: December 05, 2023, 10:52:00 AM »
Probably closer to the truth than many of us care for

Public Educators Warn Low Literacy Rates May Prevent Kids From Reading About Gay Sex
https://babylonbee.com/news/public-educators-warn-high-illiteracy-rates-may-prevent-kids-from-reading-about-gay-sex
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“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”
― William F. Buckley

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #343 on: December 06, 2023, 05:40:13 PM »
California Man Confused Why He Would Play 'GTA VI' When He Can Commit Crimes Without Consequence In Real Life
https://babylonbee.com/news/california-man-confused-why-he-would-play-gta-vi-when-he-can-commit-crimes-without-consequence-in-real-life
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“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”
― William F. Buckley

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #344 on: December 06, 2023, 05:41:05 PM »
Husband Reaches Out To NSA To See If They Know What His Wife Wants For Christmas
https://babylonbee.com/news/husband-reaches-out-to-nsa-to-see-if-they-know-what-his-wife-wants-for-christmas
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“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”
― William F. Buckley

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

230RN

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #345 on: December 06, 2023, 06:01:25 PM »
" 'Yes, we knew things would be different in the California market,' said public relations director Jacob Loera. 'But we figured GTA-vi wouldn't draw much revenue in California anyway because all of the copies would be stolen instead of purchased.' "
:rofl:
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WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #346 on: December 08, 2023, 09:29:53 AM »
 :rofl:

The Babylon Bee Writers Stand In Solidarity With Our Fellow Fake News Writers Going On Strike At The Washington Post
https://babylonbee.com/news/the-babylon-bee-writers-stand-in-solidarity-with-our-fellow-fake-news-writers-going-on-strike-at-the-washington-post
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“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”
― William F. Buckley

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #347 on: December 11, 2023, 04:35:26 PM »
Children On Best Behavior After Santa Announces Naughty Kids Now Receive 'The Marvels' On Blu-Ray
https://babylonbee.com/news/children-on-best-behavior-after-santa-announces-naughty-kids-now-receive-the-marvels-on-blu-ray
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“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”
― William F. Buckley

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #348 on: December 14, 2023, 04:38:59 PM »
Man Takes Wife On Date To Very Expensive Restaurant Only To Find McFlurry Machine Broken
https://babylonbee.com/news/man-takes-wife-on-date-to-extremely-expensive-restaurant-only-to-find-mcflurry-machine-broken
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“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”
― William F. Buckley

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #349 on: December 14, 2023, 04:44:50 PM »
Cybertruck To Come With Deployable Scoop For Removing Climate Change Protesters From Roadway
https://babylonbee.com/news/cybertruck-to-come-with-deployable-scoop-for-removing-climate-change-protesters-from-roadway
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“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”
― William F. Buckley

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi
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