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Author Topic: Babylon Bee  (Read 122720 times)

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #800 on: February 08, 2025, 01:28:42 PM »
Prince Harry Asks ICE To Deport Him To Guantanamo Bay For Some Peace And Quiet
https://babylonbee.com/news/prince-harry-asks-ice-to-deport-him-to-guantanamo-bay-for-some-peace-and-quiet
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“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”
― William F. Buckley

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #801 on: February 09, 2025, 03:20:31 PM »
Philadelphians Preemptively Burn City Down In Preparation For Winning Or Losing Super Bowl
https://babylonbee.com/news/philadelphians-preemptively-burn-city-down-in-preparation-for-winning-or-losing-super-bowl
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“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”
― William F. Buckley

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

Angel Eyes

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #802 on: February 09, 2025, 03:31:59 PM »
Candy Company Introduces New, Even Noisier Wrappers For Opening In Church

https://babylonbee.com/news/candy-company-introduces-new-even-noisier-wrappers-for-opening-in-church
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Angel Eyes

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #803 on: February 09, 2025, 11:04:31 PM »
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"The grass really is greener over shallow graves."
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WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #804 on: February 10, 2025, 03:19:46 PM »
After last nights loss the Chiefs are making some changes

Chiefs Fire Their Refs
https://babylonbee.com/news/chiefs-fire-their-refs
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“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”
― William F. Buckley

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #805 on: February 10, 2025, 03:20:37 PM »
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“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”
― William F. Buckley

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

Angel Eyes

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #806 on: February 10, 2025, 03:37:21 PM »
Quiz: Can You Guess Which Of These Things USAID Actually Funded And Which Ones We Made Up?

https://babylonbee.com/news/quiz-can-you-guess-which-of-these-things-usaid-actually-funded-and-which-ones-we-made-up

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Angel Eyes

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #807 on: February 11, 2025, 03:34:12 PM »
Sauron-Appointed Judge Rules Frodo Must Return Ring To Sauron:

https://babylonbee.com/news/sauron-appointed-judge-rules-frodo-must-return-ring-to-sauron

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Angel Eyes

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #808 on: February 12, 2025, 02:55:43 PM »
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WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #809 on: February 12, 2025, 03:02:50 PM »
Quote from: Angel Eyes on February 12, 2025, 02:55:43 PM
Government Retirement Files Ruined After Miners Dig Too Deep And Unearth Balrog

Barack learned a long time ago to not disturb Michelle while she's sleeping
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“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”
― William F. Buckley

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

Angel Eyes

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #810 on: February 13, 2025, 09:40:38 PM »
Trump Unveils Bold New Country Names

https://x.com/TheBabylonBee/status/1890182145978806377

Canada -> Gay North Dakota
Greenland -> Marjorie Taylor Greenland
Alaska -> McKinley's Happy Funland
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WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #811 on: February 16, 2025, 02:18:14 PM »
 :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Man Finally Realizes Reason People Play Hockey Is You Can Legally Punch A Canadian In The Face
https://babylonbee.com/news/man-finally-realizes-reason-to-play-hockey-is-you-can-legally-punch-a-canadian-in-the-face
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“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”
― William F. Buckley

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

Angel Eyes

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #812 on: February 21, 2025, 08:18:52 PM »
Stephen Miller uses sock puppets to explain the U.S. Constitution to the White House press corps:

https://babylonbee.com/news/stephen-miller-uses-sock-puppets-to-explain-constitution-to-white-house-press-corps
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K Frame

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #813 on: February 22, 2025, 07:01:04 AM »
Quote from: Angel Eyes on February 21, 2025, 08:18:52 PM
Stephen Miller uses sock puppets to explain the U.S. Constitution to the White House press corps:

https://babylonbee.com/news/stephen-miller-uses-sock-puppets-to-explain-constitution-to-white-house-press-corps

He needs to hold that class for every liberal in the United States because they sure as *expletive deleted*ck don't understand it.

Or, they do, but they don't want to admit that Biden did the exact same *expletive deleted*it because they're fine with it except for it being TTTTTTTTTTTTRRRRRRRRRRRRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!

and MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!
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MAGA unto others as you would have them MAGA unto you!

Dogs are our link to paradise. They don’t know evil or jealousy or discontent. To sit with a dog on a hillside on a glorious afternoon is to be back in Eden, where doing nothing was not boring—it was peace. — Milan Kundera


The gift which I am sending you is called a dog, and is in fact the most precious and valuable possession of mankind
-- Theodorus Gaza

Angel Eyes

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #814 on: February 24, 2025, 12:58:25 PM »
Admiral Piett Gets Email From Lord Vader Asking What He Accomplished Last Week

https://babylonbee.com/news/oh-no-admiral-piett-gets-email-from-darth-vader-asking-what-he-accomplished-last-week
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WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #815 on: February 26, 2025, 11:04:20 AM »
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“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”
― William F. Buckley

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

Angel Eyes

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #816 on: March 01, 2025, 10:19:49 PM »
Man regrets transitioning to woman after seeing the line for the restroom

https://babylonbee.com/news/man-regrets-transitioning-to-woman-after-seeing-line-for-restroom
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Angel Eyes

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #817 on: March 03, 2025, 01:28:44 PM »
Trump institutes military draft for everyone with a Ukrainian flag in their Facebook profile:

https://babylonbee.com/news/trump-institutes-military-draft-for-everyone-with-ukraine-flag-in-their-facebook-profile

(I know it's the Bee but that's a really good idea)
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K Frame

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #818 on: March 03, 2025, 01:40:05 PM »
He should do a similar executive order for everyone with a "Free Palestine" note on FB. Of if there are pictures of them wearing a checkered tablecloth.

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MAGA unto others as you would have them MAGA unto you!

Dogs are our link to paradise. They don’t know evil or jealousy or discontent. To sit with a dog on a hillside on a glorious afternoon is to be back in Eden, where doing nothing was not boring—it was peace. — Milan Kundera


The gift which I am sending you is called a dog, and is in fact the most precious and valuable possession of mankind
-- Theodorus Gaza

Angel Eyes

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #819 on: March 08, 2025, 11:37:01 AM »
Laid-off IRS agent gets new job checking receipts at Costco exit:

https://babylonbee.com/news/laid-off-irs-agent-gets-new-job-checking-receipts-at-costco-exit

"Welcome to Costco.  I love you."
« Last Edit: March 08, 2025, 04:02:29 PM by Angel Eyes »
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WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #820 on: March 09, 2025, 06:58:46 PM »
Tony the Tiger is next

'Ladies And Gentlemen, We Got Him': RFK Jr. Announces Seal Team Six Has Neutralized The Kool-Aid Man
https://babylonbee.com/news/ladies-and-gentlemen-we-got-him-rfk-jr-announces-seal-team-six-has-neutralized-the-kool-aid-man
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“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”
― William F. Buckley

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #821 on: March 10, 2025, 03:58:55 PM »
Miracle: Face Of JD Vance Appears In Local Man's Toast
https://babylonbee.com/news/miracle-face-of-jd-vance-appears-in-local-mans-toast
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“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”
― William F. Buckley

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #822 on: March 13, 2025, 05:06:37 PM »
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“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”
― William F. Buckley

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

MechAg94

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #823 on: March 14, 2025, 09:49:09 PM »
https://babylonbee.com/news/federal-judge-appoints-himself-president
Federal Judge Appoints Himself President

Quote
"There's nothing we can do," said legal experts. "He's a federal judge."


Quote
At publishing time, Judge Dithers had been unseated as President by a higher court judge who declared himself President instead.

 :rofl:
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“It is much more important to kill bad bills than to pass good ones.”  ― Calvin Coolidge
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