Author Topic: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"  (Read 786 times)

Ben

  • Administrator
  • Senior Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 46,264
  • I'm an Extremist!
"Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« on: March 23, 2024, 09:14:19 AM »
Okay, is this something that has always been around and I haven't been aware, or is this some stupid new thing that has popped up? I have, in the last month, run into multiple videos and articles saying that "men don't use straws to drink".

I get a drink at the drive through, I'm using a straw. I get a glass of water at a restaurant where the hygiene is questionable, I use a straw. If I feel like using a straw anywhere else, as a man, IDGAF what anybody says or thinks, I'll use a straw if I want to. I'll drink out of a sippy cup if I want to. Which, ironically, is technically what my manly Iron Infidel water bottle, that I use during manly boxing workouts, is - a big sippy cup. Come at me, bro.  :laugh:
"I'm a foolish old man that has been drawn into a wild goose chase by a harpy in trousers and a nincompoop."

WLJ

  • friends
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 28,796
  • On Patrol In The Epsilon Eridani System
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #1 on: March 23, 2024, 09:20:21 AM »
Unless the drink is in a cup with a lid and I'm in the car no sissy stick for me. Milk shakes excluded from that.
Has nothing to do with being manly just that I just don't like them otherwise.
"Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us".
- Calvin and Hobbes

Perd Hapley

  • Superstar of the Internet
  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 61,493
  • My prepositions are on/in
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #2 on: March 23, 2024, 09:45:24 AM »
Straws aren't for girls. They're for caged hamsters.



I just prefer to drink like a human.

I also dislike those sippy cup lids on restaurant or gas station coffee cups, and for the same reason. It just doesn't feel right.

(Yeah, milkshakes are an exception. Straws make sense there.)
"Doggies are angel babies!" -- my wife

Ben

  • Administrator
  • Senior Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 46,264
  • I'm an Extremist!
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #3 on: March 23, 2024, 09:48:47 AM »
Straws aren't for girls. They're for caged hamsters.

YOU'RE A CAGED HAMSTER!
"I'm a foolish old man that has been drawn into a wild goose chase by a harpy in trousers and a nincompoop."

Nick1911

  • Administrator
  • Senior Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 8,492
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #4 on: March 23, 2024, 09:50:15 AM »
If I'm at a restaurant and served a beverage with a straw, I prefer to not use the straw.  I don't consider this a matter of masculinity though; it's just my personal preference.

230RN

  • saw it coming.
  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 18,943
  • ...shall not be allowed.
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #5 on: March 23, 2024, 09:54:05 AM »
"as a man, IDGAF what anybody says or thinks"

Pretty much true.  Some limitations.  I'll go along with it in this limited area.

Wife2 always carried a couple of straws in her purse to avoid messing up her lipstick.  She drove me crazy when she'd raise her glass and probe around with her tongue until she found the end, then wiggle the tip around the end of it for a few seconds.

And she knew it drove me ...ummm... bonkers and would exaggerate and amplify the exploratory .... umm... explorations just to get my ...ummm...goat.

I tried to make a pun relating to "aural" vesus "oral," but one just wouldn't come.

I'm not signing this one so nobody will know who posted it.
WHATEVER YOUR DEFINITION OF "INFRINGE " IS, YOU SHOULDN'T BE DOING IT.

zahc

  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 5,803
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #6 on: March 23, 2024, 10:16:49 AM »
Any statement of the form "real men X" can be dismissed immediately
Maybe a rare occurence, but then you only have to get murdered once to ruin your whole day.
--Tallpine

Perd Hapley

  • Superstar of the Internet
  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 61,493
  • My prepositions are on/in
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #7 on: March 23, 2024, 10:42:00 AM »
Any statement of the form "real men X" can be dismissed immediately

Real men dismiss this comment immediately.
"Doggies are angel babies!" -- my wife

grampster

  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 9,456
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #8 on: March 23, 2024, 12:56:40 PM »
A manly man pays attention to no one.  Caesar
"Never wrestle with a pig.  You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it."  G.B. Shaw

Tuco

  • Fastest non-sequitur in the West.
  • friends
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 3,123
  • If you miss you had better miss very well
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #9 on: March 23, 2024, 01:48:27 PM »
The profound aversion to straws is born from the same homophobic menchildren afraid to wash their ass.
7-11 was a part time job.

Cliffh

  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2,267
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #10 on: March 23, 2024, 02:50:10 PM »

If in the car, I'll use a straw.  Or for a milkshake, until it melts enough to drink out of the glass normally

In sketchy restaurants, well, if there's "grunge" in/on the glass, it's likely to transfer to the drink anyway - so using a straw is useless.

Perd Hapley

  • Superstar of the Internet
  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 61,493
  • My prepositions are on/in
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #11 on: March 23, 2024, 03:02:24 PM »
YOU'RE A CAGED HAMSTER!

"Forsooth, we are all but hamsters in the cage of this life."
-- Juvenal
"Doggies are angel babies!" -- my wife

Perd Hapley

  • Superstar of the Internet
  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 61,493
  • My prepositions are on/in
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #12 on: March 23, 2024, 03:03:24 PM »

In sketchy restaurants, well, if there's "grunge" in/on the glass, it's likely to transfer to the drink anyway - so using a straw is useless.


You'd think. I guess it makes people feel better.
"Doggies are angel babies!" -- my wife

RocketMan

  • Mad Rocket Scientist
  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 13,673
  • Semper Fidelis
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #13 on: March 23, 2024, 03:20:43 PM »
I use a straw in drinks with crushed ice.  I've found that ice tends to jam in the bottom of a glass.  It has an annoying tendency to let go unexpectedly and slide out into my lap when I tilt the glass back to get the last of the beverage out of it.
If there really was intelligent life on other planets, we'd be sending them foreign aid.

Conservatives see George Orwell's "1984" as a cautionary tale.  Progressives view it as a "how to" manual.

My wife often says to me, "You are evil and must be destroyed." She may be right.

Liberals believe one should never let reason, logic and facts get in the way of a good emotional argument.

K Frame

  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 44,595
  • I Am Inimical
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #14 on: March 24, 2024, 08:27:43 AM »
The profound aversion to straws is born from the same homophobic menchildren afraid to wash their ass.

This.
Carbon Monoxide, sucking the life out of idiots, 'tards, and fools since man tamed fire.

WLJ

  • friends
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 28,796
  • On Patrol In The Epsilon Eridani System
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #15 on: March 24, 2024, 08:30:29 AM »
I use a straw in drinks with crushed ice.  I've found that ice tends to jam in the bottom of a glass.  It has an annoying tendency to let go unexpectedly and slide out into my lap when I tilt the glass back to get the last of the beverage out of it.

Crushed ice is so that they can sell you a $3 cup of 90% water 10% drink.
"Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us".
- Calvin and Hobbes

MechAg94

  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 33,870
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #16 on: March 24, 2024, 09:08:52 PM »
Crushed ice is so that they can sell you a $3 cup of 90% water 10% drink.
I recall a college professor (heat transfer) who estimated the ice might cost more than the soda mix.  I don't remember the math he threw out. 
“It is much more important to kill bad bills than to pass good ones.”  ― Calvin Coolidge

MechAg94

  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 33,870
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #17 on: March 24, 2024, 09:12:12 PM »
If in the car, I'll use a straw.  Or for a milkshake, until it melts enough to drink out of the glass normally

In sketchy restaurants, well, if there's "grunge" in/on the glass, it's likely to transfer to the drink anyway - so using a straw is useless.
A man I know who once worked down in Venezuela (before the commie stuff started) is the first one I heard talk about using straws since he didn't know how well they cleaned the glass.  He figured he couldn't do much about what was in the drink, but he didn't have to put his mouth on the outside of glass. 

I just figured it was an easy way to be certain I didn't spill something on work clothes.  Or in the truck with a fountain drink. 
“It is much more important to kill bad bills than to pass good ones.”  ― Calvin Coolidge

MechAg94

  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 33,870
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #18 on: March 24, 2024, 09:14:20 PM »
When I moved to my current area, I had people tell me something similar about men using umbrellas.  I had never heard that prior.
“It is much more important to kill bad bills than to pass good ones.”  ― Calvin Coolidge

cordex

  • Administrator
  • Senior Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 8,682
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #19 on: March 25, 2024, 05:55:23 AM »
When visiting a Caribbean island as a kid I noticed that all the locals used straws when drinking out of cans. I asked and they said that the cans got dirty when being shipped in so they used the straws to avoid putting their lips on the can.

Maybe they are right, but opening the can also dunks a piece right in the drink.

AZRedhawk44

  • friends
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 13,987
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #20 on: March 25, 2024, 10:54:38 AM »
When visiting a Caribbean island as a kid I noticed that all the locals used straws when drinking out of cans. I asked and they said that the cans got dirty when being shipped in so they used the straws to avoid putting their lips on the can.

Maybe they are right, but opening the can also dunks a piece right in the drink.

Having worked in a cannery, I can attest that warehouses are full of mice and rats.  There's no getting rid of them, even in the best warehouses.  They get into the pallets of product and build nests and *expletive deleted*it on top of product lids.

I don't drink out of beverage cans unless I can't help it. 

As for straws, I always envision the origin of the straw as a way for a 1920's young lady to not mess up her lipstick when going out on a date to the soda fountain.  I see them as unnecessary and wasteful, and don't use them.  The only exception is a milkshake.
"But whether the Constitution really be one thing, or another, this much is certain - that it has either authorized such a government as we have had, or has been powerless to prevent it. In either case, it is unfit to exist."
--Lysander Spooner

I reject your authoritah!

WLJ

  • friends
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 28,796
  • On Patrol In The Epsilon Eridani System
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #21 on: March 25, 2024, 11:29:13 AM »
When I moved to my current area, I had people tell me something similar about men using umbrellas.  I had never heard that prior.

They're all wet
"Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us".
- Calvin and Hobbes

Perd Hapley

  • Superstar of the Internet
  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 61,493
  • My prepositions are on/in
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #22 on: March 25, 2024, 01:48:10 PM »
When I moved to my current area, I had people tell me something similar about men using umbrellas.  I had never heard that prior.

Whether it's right or wrong, I have the same idea in my head. It's just my point of view. I don't go around telling guys they're sissies for using umbrellas.
"Doggies are angel babies!" -- my wife

Bogie

  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 10,261
  • Hunkered in South St. Louis, right by Route 66
    • Third Rate Pundit
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #23 on: March 25, 2024, 02:02:23 PM »
I use a straw.
 
I have a mustache.
 

Blog under construction

gunsmith

  • I forgot to get vaccinated!
  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 8,187
  • I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that.
Re: "Real Men Don't Use Straws"
« Reply #24 on: March 29, 2024, 08:19:19 PM »
 I read somewhere it is healthier to use a straw.
 I hardly ever go out to eat these days but always insist on a straw.
Politicians and bureaucrats are considered productive if they swarm the populace like a plague of locust, devouring all substance in their path and leaving a swath of destruction like a firestorm. The technical term is "bipartisanship".
Rocket Man: "The need for booster shots for the immunized has always been based on the science.  Political science, not medical science."