So... Karen pulls up at the store, and needs a tire patched.
We don't have a lift. We can't take the wheel off the car. We don't even have a jack that we can use with the public. Insurance. We show Karen the instructions on the plug kit, point out that it is a temporary fix, and hey, have at it.
Karen becomes upset that we are not going to do it. Asks to talk to the manager. The manager explains that the directions are on the package, points out that it is a temporary fix, and that we sell car parts, but we do not work on cars.
Battery installations happen for SOME cars. You're driving a Dodge Avenger? We don't have a lift. You're driving a newer Volkswagen? Sorry, don't want to chance bricking your car.
And then there was the guy who drove up on a flat, insisted upon buying a can of fix-a-flat, after we told him that he needed to put a spare on or call for a tow, who got upset because the contents of the can ended up all over the pavement, because that tire was no longer a tire... It was giant holes surrounded by a little rubber.
We'd put in headlight bulbs. For many vehicles. You expect me to take an hour to remove half the stuff up there to get to it? Not happening. You have a nice new car that you can't work on. And it is dark. And sleeting. Don't buy an older Cadillac - you have to take the whole front clip apart to change the headlight bulbs, and they cost $110/each... In fact, if you're buying a car, and you check the specs (you WILL check the specs, right?), and it has HID headlights, get something just a little less sporty/luxurious...
Some Fords, to change the battery, you need to remove the windshield wiper arms... That's on our "don't do that" list. We can refer you to a real mechanic.
There was the "street racer" who decided that he needed a new tree air freshener. His card borked. "Run it again! I have a thousand dollars on that!" So, lather rinse repeat a few times... Not gonna happen. He leaves, comes back a half hour later, wants us to refund a half-dozen bounced check charges that his bank card hit him with. Not gonna happen. He throws a tantrum. Assaults me. We throw him out of the store. He beats on the glass. Then he slashes one of my van's tires.
The customer ain't always right. Often not even near.
And then there's the guy who pulls up in a nice new Chevy. Comes in, picks up a gallon of green antifreeze. "My mechanic told me to get fiddy fiddy - is this it?" "Sir, are you using that in the car you drove up in?" "My daddy always used this green."
Have you ever seen what happens when you mix GM antifreeze with the 1990s green? It ain't pretty.
No, I'm not going to install a new radiator or heater core for you.
We would sell starters and alternators too. We could recommend mechanics. We even, if we were not busy, and it was someone who just pulled in off the highway, help them do it. Little old ladies we would help with a lot of things.
But when Aaron Arsehole putts up in his BMW, demands the dealer level of sucking up, and has to go through three cards to find one that will work for a $12.95 item...
You know, sometimes they'd tip us... And it wasn't the Cadillac or BMW or "I'm special, because that is my 1999 Mercedes C300" folks who would tip. It was the folks driving the Impalas, where you'd tell them "We're not supposed to install the battery because we have to take a brace off, but we can help you do it. (Now get out of my way, because Mr. Battery Impact Gun is gonna have you out of here in five minutes.)"
Licensing in repair shops? Around here, they need to get the air compressor certified and the lift safety certified. Some mechanics are ASE certified.
Glad to be gone. I'm too old to be crawling on the ground like a lizard trying to help someone who doesn't appreciate it. You wonder why the parts stores tend to have young kids at the front counters? Because they don't have the patience that old farts do.
