Armed Polite Society
Main Forums => The Roundtable => Topic started by: AZRedhawk44 on March 20, 2009, 11:39:12 AM
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TV's?
Driving to work this morning. Ultimate Electronics ad on the radio. It was nothing but letters, numbers and acronyms.
"Get a 52inch 1080p 120hz LCD HDTV from JVC..."
Argh.
Given the fact that TV's have to be high def now in order to receive a signal at all over the air waves, can't we just call the things TV's instead of HDTV's? And get to a standard resolution so I don't have to hear all the stupid acronyms?
[/rant]
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As long as they still sell the older stuff, you kind of need to know that info.
They delayed the HD only date.
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Given the fact that TV's have to be high def now in order to receive a signal at all over the air waves, can't we just call the things TV's instead of HDTV's?
[/rant]
Not true. You only need a digital capable TV. Digital doesn't mean HD.
Chris
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Nope.
The one I truly despise is the 1-800 Cars for Kids Jingle...... The guy who wrote that needs to sent to Gitmo and waterboarded daily....
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Scout, I turn the radio off when that comes on.
What annoys me are the "This is a public announcement" ads. "People with last names starting with A-M may begin calling now. People with last names starting with N-Z may start calling tomorrow morning after 8am." And yet, the same ads play every day.
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Wrong.
New-manufacture televisions just need to capture the digital broadcast signal, vs. the now-obsolete analog signal.
They don't have to be HD.
The digital signal is viewable in SD (Standard Definition), too.
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Radio advertising certainly has it's place. Where else do you suggest I advertise my series of audio books that teach sign-language?
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"There are secret programs that credit card companies don't want you to know about." Secret programs? Really? ;/
But I mostly hate any radio ad where the narrator suddenly says "Hi!" halfway into the piece. "Gold is a great investment. Hi, I'm Jim Smith. Send for blah-blah-blah."
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I just bought a new SD TV. Wal-mart has a little 14" RCA marked down to $78 that was a perfect replacement for the tiny, black and white, fishbowl Sampo I had been using (with a digital converter box =D). It's cheap and might not last forever, but the picture is decent and I couldn't find anything better that was remotely close in price.
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The gold-hawking Jim Smith is a pseudonym for MicroBalrog.
Or so I've heard... =D
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Almost as annoying are the "fake" announcer ones.
"We'll be back to the show in a minute, but I just saw here, what did I do with that paper.... Oh here it is. Did you know that you can make a bazillion dollars/cure rectal cancer/lose 300 lbs, just by calling this number....."
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You can probably list a whole bunch of ads that are supposed to be funny and sometimes are THE FIRST TIME YOU HEAR THEM. After the first time, it seems to tick you off more and more each time you hear it.
I seem to remember a really old Simpson's where he meets a guy who said he was the inventor of the radio add. Homer slugs him. "I deserve that" he says.
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Cellphone commercials and "male enhancement" commercials.
Gah!
Oh, and the screaming hucksters for car commercials. There's a guy that does the voice for the commercials around here. I want to kill him in a very slow, agonizing manner.
I think Neal Boortz said that there is a corollary between the price of the car and the decibel level of the narrator. The cheap car commercials scream at you, while the luxury car commercials have the quiet, educated, refined voice narrating them.
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Sham-Wow! =D
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Sham-Wow! =D
Head-On! Apply directly to the forehead! Head-On! Apply directly to the forehead! Head-On! Apply directly to the forehead!
I'd like to introduce a few of those scammers to a crowbar. (HeadOn consists almost entirely of wax) Then they could see how well it does in curing headaches.
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Head-On! Apply directly to the forehead! Head-On!
Banschwerk! Apply directly to the poster.
Chris
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HI! I'M BILLY MAYS, AND YOU NEED SOME GOD DAMN OXYCLEAN!
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The gold-hawking Jim Smith is a pseudonym for MicroBalrog.
Or so I've heard... =D
If I had enough gold to sell it to people, do you think I'd be applying for financial aid?
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HI! I'M BILLY MAYS, AND YOU NEED SOME GOD DAMN OXYCLEAN!
Would it be unseemly of me to say that I would thoroughly enjoy pulling that man's arm off and beating him to death with the wet end?
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Would it be unseemly of me to say that I would thoroughly enjoy pulling that man's arm off and beating him to death with the wet end?
Actually, that's quite polite compared to the thoughts I have.
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Sham-Wow! =D
Doesn't he look a lot like the guy from CSI: NY ?
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I think it was posted here, but the Sham-Wow! guy had a falling out with Scientology, which cost him his career, money, and reputation (what little he had). He's using proceeds from the Sham-Wow! gig to fight back. If true, you gotta respect a guy who's willing to put what little he's got against the Scientologists, unlike the Anonymous crowd who taunt from behind masks.
Chris
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From what I can make of what he's saying "Fitz" is the Sham-Wow guy, he's got another one out now too, the "Slap Chop". I think he's great at what he does. I actually have visions of hiring him to do a plug for a show I'm promoting this summer. (Toad's Place, New Haven, CT July 19th tickets on sale now at Toad's website! =D ) Anyhoo, he always says, "If you call within the next 20 minutes (cause you know we can't do this all day) I'll give you the Graty...linguini, martini, bikini..." :lol:
Billy Mays on the other hand Watch his hand motions, drives me nuts. ;/
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Doesn't he look a lot like the guy from CSI: NY ?
Thanks. I couldn't figure out why he looked familiar when I first saw him.
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From what I can make of what he's saying "Fitz" is the Sham-Wow guy, he's got another one out now too, the "Slap Chop". I think he's great at what he does. I actually have visions of hiring him to do a plug for a show I'm promoting this summer. (Toad's Place, New Haven, CT July 19th tickets on sale now at Toad's website! =D ) Anyhoo, he always says, "If you call within the next 20 minutes (cause you know we can't do this all day) I'll give you the Graty...linguini, martini, bikini..." :lol:
Billy Mays on the other hand Watch his hand motions, drives me nuts. ;/
I had to look him up after your and mtnbkr's posts. His stage name's Vince Offer.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vince_Offer (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vince_Offer)
I think he pitches well, too. At least so far, and his voice doesn't grate on my nerves like Billy Mays'.
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Almost as annoying are the "fake" announcer ones.
"We'll be back to the show in a minute, but I just saw here, what did I do with that paper.... Oh here it is. Did you know that you can make a bazillion dollars/cure rectal cancer/lose 300 lbs, just by calling this number....."
My blood pressure rises at the thought. I don't know how well they work on the commercial music stations, but they sound extra-fakey on talk stations, where any voice other than Ingraham/Hannity/Limbaugh immediately sounds out of place.
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VINCE! That's what he's saying, I was hearing either "Fitz" or Finch". Thanks Bogie. Something tells me I can't afford him. :laugh:
"You're gonna love my nuts!" =D
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Interesting about the Scientology angle.
The guy's still annoying as hell, though.
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http://vinceoffer.net/
and yes, I did contact him. :laugh:
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Maybe I should get ahold of Billy Mays too and have a war of the announcers. =D
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Maybe I should get ahold of Billy Mays too and have a war of the announcers. =D
It'd be interesting. While I was surfing for info on him I found an audio recording from Adam Corolla's show, on YouTube, of Billy dissing Vince. No love lost there.
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link please! :laugh:
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Ask and ye shall receive:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GPLrm3Omkjg&feature=related (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GPLrm3Omkjg&feature=related)
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Daaaamn, maybe I SHOULD get ahold of BM and set up the pitch off for my show! :laugh:
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I'm not nearly so vexed by the delivery of the pitchman. What annoys me to the point of spontaneous human combustion are the ads for personal injury lawyers. Asbestos and mesothelioma has replaced car wrecks and whiplash as the jackpot in our casino. Well, that and small rifle primers.
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Can I use OxyClean to launder my Sham-Wow?
Or will combining merchandise from different pitchmen be sort of like mixing up a batch of Tannerite?
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Probaly tear a hole in the space time continuum. Nobody needs THAT!
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Thanks. I couldn't figure out why he looked familiar when I first saw him.
He kinda reminds me of Squiggy on Laverne & Shirley....
As for my own most-hated commercials, there's several (mostly TV, but oh well,)
Taco Bell's 'drag queen nachos'
Those goddamn "Hoveround" (sp) wheelchair commercials just drive me batshit.
Although, on the other hand, there was one hilarious commercial for a gun shop in Bakersfield, CA on TV a few times... http://www.bearmntsports.com/
The commercial is down towards the bottom.
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HOVERROUND!! :lol:
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if you want the hovercrap ads to really annoy you, try to get them to send you(or your grandmother) some information without the inhouse swindle :O
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The one commercial that really gets my blood pressure up is the commercial for the Sunsetter retractable awning where a man is doing most of the spiel and a woman (presumably his wife) is constantly nagging him to "tell them about the discount, Harry". This year they re-edited it a little to make it even more annoying. Something about her whiney voice and persistant nagging interruption to his sales pitch just makes me want to punch her right in the nose.
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Wouldn't you know my wife just showed me literature on the awnings! Spooky man,,, :O
Should I ask her about the discount? =D
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Wouldn't you know my wife just showed me literature on the awnings! Spooky man,,, :O
Should I ask her about the discount? =D
Nahhh, just punch her in the nose..... =D =D :O :O
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The one commercial that really gets my blood pressure up is the commercial for the Sunsetter retractable awning where a man is doing most of the spiel and a woman (presumably his wife) is constantly nagging him to "tell them about the discount, Harry". This year they re-edited it a little to make it even more annoying. Something about her whiney voice and persistant nagging interruption to his sales pitch just makes me want to punch her right in the nose.
Oh Lord I hate that commercial.....
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After absorbing said ads for many years, I have come to the conclusion that radio ads must be absolutely rock-bottom cheap. Free, almost. A lot of them sound like they just cut one take and ran with it.
Worst of all are the ads by local businessmen (or women) who simply don't understand that they might not have the best voice or best acting ability to be hawking their own stuff on the radio. Some places around here I'd be loathe to patronize, simply because of their commercials.
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Nahhh, just punch her in the nose..... =D =D :O :O
I would but she might hit me back, and she's been working out! :O
:laugh:
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I heard one today that reminded me of this thread.
It's a Coca-cola ad. In our area, they replaced the 20 oz bottles (that were retailing for about 1.49 at the convienience store) with a choice of either 16 oz bottles for 99 cents or a 24 oz bottle for $1.49.
There's a commercial with an effeminate sounding man extolling the virtues of Coca-cola, and then at the end he says in a whispered voice "Did you know there giving away Coca cola in 16oz bottles for 99c? That's not even a dollar! I mean, that's not even a dollar!"
Annoys the hell out of me, that one does.
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One of the fast food joints had a TV commercial that made me want to run through the wall. Touting an "any three items for five dollars" special, a guy at the counter note the price, asks for three items and says, "How much?" Countergirl says, "Five bucks." He says, "What about if I get (three other items)?" "Five bucks." He says, "OK, what if I get (three other items)?" "Five bucks." And so on, and so on...
ANY THREE ITEMS FOR FIVE DOLLARS, ahole! GOT IT?
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Worst of all are the ads by local businessmen (or women) who simply don't understand that they might not have the best voice or best acting ability to be hawking their own stuff on the radio.
I have been very tempted to call up a local restaurant and offer my vocal talents. Probably do it this fall when I'm up here fulltime.
Those goddamn "Hoveround" (sp) wheelchair commercials just drive me batshit.
:laugh:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UKPeYrrhIvQ
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The Total Transformation ads always make me laugh. A guy with a New York goombah accent talking about how to make your kids behave. I don't know what he actually says. To me, it always sounds like, "When I get through with your kids, they'll be afraid to sneeze without my permission. And I'll teach YOU how to beat the sass out of 'em without leavin' a single mark." :laugh:
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The Total Transformation ads always make me laugh. A guy with a New York goombah accent talking about how to make your kids behave. I don't know what he actually says. To me, it always sounds like, "When I get through with your kids, they'll be afraid to sneeze without my permission. And I'll teach YOU how to beat the sass out of 'em without leavin' a single mark." :laugh:
Yeah, I always wonder what kinda scam that guy is running.
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The Total Transformation ads always make me laugh. A guy with a New York goombah accent talking about how to make your kids behave. I don't know what he actually says. To me, it always sounds like, "When I get through with your kids, they'll be afraid to sneeze without my permission. And I'll teach YOU how to beat the sass out of 'em without leavin' a single mark." :laugh:
LOL, when I see that commercial I turn to the wife and say, "I'll bet it's a big stick!" I make sure the kid is within earshot too. =D
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The Total Transformation ads always make me laugh. A guy with a New York goombah accent talking about how to make your kids behave. I don't know what he actually says. To me, it always sounds like, "When I get through with your kids, they'll be afraid to sneeze without my permission. And I'll teach YOU how to beat the sass out of 'em without leavin' a single mark." :laugh:
[Don Corleone voice] Making children behave is easy.....you make 'em an offer they can't refuse.... [/Don Corleone voice]
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I thought of more...
The HD radio ads comparing HD radio to various sea creatures.
The McDonald's ads.
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The HD radio ads comparing HD radio to various sea creatures.
I like those, though they're not as good as the ads that have the old radios acting like first wives, trying to keep their owners from moving on to the trophy wife HD.
The HD virginity ads were also humorous, for what they were.
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I'm always annoyed.
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I'm always annoyed-ing.
Fixed your suffix, Mike.... =D
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I like those, though they're not as good as the ads that have the old radios acting like first wives, trying to keep their owners from moving on to the trophy wife HD.
The HD virginity ads were also humorous, for what they were.
We don't have those down here. Course, this is the bible belt.
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LOL, when I see that commercial I turn to the wife and say, "I'll bet it's a big stick!" I make sure the kid is within earshot too. =D
In the car with the wife and kids one time when that ad came on. Mrs. Scout said "I wonder what those words are ?"
I just looked over at her and said "Cattle Prod".
The kids eyes almost came out of their heads.