how bad did he screw up in gilbert ariz?

[geronimotwo]

my wifes sister is going through a breakup after 15 years of marriage.  she wants to leave, and he wants to work it out.  I'm not going to take sides,  but i do like her husband.

so, she goes out to a couples house drinkin, and when he comes to find her she is in the hot-tub in her underwear.   now, two days later after he's been drinkin, he confronts the man of the couple and in the course of things he is told "it wasn't my idea for her to take her clothes off".  so he punches the guy and then runs back to his own house, packs a bag and leaves.  the guy he hit called the police, but didn't file charges.

does anyone out there know the law well enough to guess what kind of trouble he is going to be in?  his phone is off, or i would have told him to turn himself in already.

at least he didn't shoot the guy (as he was packin then and now as far as i know).  

(i don't know if the police are actually looking for him, only that he thinks they are.)

[Brad Johnson]

Assault.  A Class A (violent) misdemeanor in most states.  If convicted, he loses his CHL.  Won't help his position in the divorce proceedings either, no matter how much shenanigans the soon-to-be-ex is pulling.

Brad

[geronimotwo]

ouch,  hope he has come to his senses already. either that or made it to mexico lol.

[vaskidmark]

If this

the guy he hit called the police, but didn't file charges

is correct then he will not be in any trouble except with the wife, which he seems to have been in already.  No need to turn himself in if there are no charges outstanding.  As a matter of fact I can't think of a way he could turn himself in under those circumstances.

There's an awful lot of alcohol going around this couple.  Might be worth being the first one to tell you to stay out of their troubles, and encourage your wife to stay out, too.  Not that it's going to help, but there it is - I said it.

Just FYI, a decent divorce attorney will be able to get his leaving worked into "constructive desertion" - the legal theory that you had a good reason for leaving or were "forced/provoked" into doing so.  Too bad the delicto was not completely flagrante - would have helped his side of the divorce.

So now we have our third divorce?  What's next?

stay safe.

[Balog]

What skid said.

[BReilley]

Regarding his CCW license, I don't believe it will be revoked unless he is charged and convicted of domestic violence/abuse.  My CCW instructor, and what books I have read, indicate that domestic abuse is the only non-felony crime which can result in revocation.

Regardless, if he truly is not being charged he is fortunate.  He should know how close he got to jail time and fines, and hopefully he will think twice next time he wants to smack someone, no matter how deserving he may be.

For what it's worth, I'm sorry for his situation.  It sounds eerily similar to something happening to a couple who is dear to me. :(

[Balog]

I've gotta say, I don't understand people who get angry and  towards the person their spouse cheated with but not the spouse. Sumdood from the bar didn't promise to be faithful to me, my wife did.

[crt360]

My CCW instructor, and what books I have read, indicate that domestic abuse is the only non-felony crime which can result in revocation.

I think you might be confusing revocation of CCW and losing right to own/possess firearms, at least as Texas and some other states do it.  Just about anything above the lowliest misdemeanor can result in revocation of a concealed carry permit.  Felony convictions and misdemeanor convictions involving assault on a household member will likely result in losing the guns altogether. 

I've gotta say, I don't understand people who get angry and  towards the person their spouse cheated with but not the spouse. Sumdood from the bar didn't promise to be faithful to me, my wife did.

No kidding.  Of course, maybe he was thinking ahead - beat the wife, guaranteed loss of CCW and guns - slug Sumdood down the street and only lose CCW, unless Sumdood feels guilty (or sorry for him) and doesn't file charges, in which case he gets to keep everything (except wife).

[MicroBalrog]

I've gotta say, I don't understand people who get angry and  towards the person their spouse cheated with but not the spouse. Sumdood from the bar didn't promise to be faithful to me, my wife did.

Yes, but some people have a lower barrier of inhibitions WRT punching a guy as opposed to punching their wife, or a woman in general.

[geronimotwo]

If this  is correct then he will not be in any trouble except with the wife, which he seems to have been in already.  No need to turn himself in if there are no charges outstanding.  As a matter of fact I can't think of a way he could turn himself in under those circumstances.

There's an awful lot of alcohol going around this couple.  Might be worth being the first one to tell you to stay out of their troubles, and encourage your wife to stay out, too.  Not that it's going to help, but there it is - I said it.

Just FYI, a decent divorce attorney will be able to get his leaving worked into "constructive desertion" - the legal theory that you had a good reason for leaving or were "forced/provoked" into doing so.  Too bad the delicto was not completely flagrante - would have helped his side of the divorce.

So now we have our third divorce?  What's next?

stay safe.

asking my wife to stay out of her sisters business is like asking water to run uphill!  unfortunatly for me, i tend to back the husband as i have heard of a number of indescretions through the years, on the sisters side, through my other half.  but still that just gets me in deep doo.  i feel a big part of their disconnection started while she was taking an anti-depressant some years ago.  it seemed to create a rift in their emotions.  but it could be their drifting apart caused her need for anti-depressants.

[vaskidmark]

"asking my wife to stay out of her sisters business is like asking water to run uphill!"

QFT

Never said ask your wife to stay out of it.  The word was "encouraged" as in "Sweetie Honeybun Dumpling, just so we don't end up like your sister the slimeball and that poor innocent saint of a man that she has been martyring for the last 15 years, how about you try to keep your big yap shut around me about what's going on, OK?"  Or some variant of that general thought.   (I tell ya, those hints from the Norman Vincent Peale class I took seem to come in handy just about every day.)

On further reflection, maybe it would be better if you just kept out of it and responded to everything said about it with the ubiquitous "Yes, dear" response that I believe was first uttered shortly after Ug had bopped his first woman over the head and dragged her to his cave.

Best of British luck to you during the drama.

stay safe.

[Zardozimo Oprah Bannedalas]

I've gotta say, I don't understand people who get angry and  towards the person their spouse cheated with but not the spouse. Sumdood from the bar didn't promise to be faithful to me, my wife did.

He perceived Sumdood as talking smack against his wimmens, so he slugged him. Sumdood was saying, in effect "Dude, you married a [pejorative synonym for tramp]." This reflects poorly on Sumdood's chick-choosing ability, and his overall intelligence.

[Azrael256]

I have a rule regarding situations like this.  First, I will resolve the Israeli/Palestinian conflict.  Next, I will unite the two Koreas.  Following that, I will talk the Chinese into backing off of Taiwan.

Then, and only then, will I wade into somebody's divorce.  You have to start small and work your way up.

[Hawkmoon]

... he punches the guy and then runs back to his own house, packs a bag and leaves.  the guy he hit called the police, but didn't file charges.

does anyone out there know the law well enough to guess what kind of trouble he is going to be in?  his phone is off, or i would have told him to turn himself in already.

Turn himself in for ... what?

The guy he hit isn't pressing charges. The cops aren't looking for him. WHY would he turn himself in? What would he say -- "Hi, I'm the guy you're not looking for, the one with no charges against me. Which cell do I sleep in?"

[geronimotwo]

does someone need to press charges?  either way, it wasn't the best idea to pack a bag and head out.

[Balog]

Yes, but some people have a lower barrier of inhibitions WRT punching a guy as opposed to punching their wife, or a woman in general.

Which, to me, would lead to punching no one. Like I said, unless it was a close friend of mine or something, I've gotta imagine I'd be way more angry at my wife than the guy she cheated with.

He perceived Sumdood as talking smack against his wimmens, so he slugged him. Sumdood was saying, in effect "Dude, you married a [pejorative synonym for tramp]." This reflects poorly on Sumdood's chick-choosing ability, and his overall intelligence.

His wife is cheating on him. [pejorative synonym] sounds about right.

[Zardozimo Oprah Bannedalas]

His wife is cheating on him. [pejorative synonym] sounds about right.

Sumdood can't handle the truth.

[geronimotwo]

btw,  just found out he is back home,  no police intervention.

[Matthew Carberry]

So she's at a couple's house who are mutual friends in the hot tub in her underwear.

Where, exactly, is the "cheating"?

Getting drunk, with friends, and getting into a hot tub in the closest thing you have to a bathing suit handy (though she probably could have borrowed one, but see "drunk") isn't even that suspicious depending I guess on the underwear or the normal bathing suit that would be worn.

Hubby then confronts the husband and apparently accuses him of malfeasance and is told quite rightly that the wife is a grown woman, nothing indecent happened as they are all friends and if he doesn't like it talk to his drunk wife and he hits the guy?

Man up nancy and either control your wife or dump her if you can't deal.