1) If you call someone in the Chicagoland area, do not say that your name is Michael Jordan (especially with your accent). I'm sorry I laughed out loud when you told me that.
2) Yes, I have a computer, but you didn't answer when I asked if you had Prince Albert in a can.
and finally,
3) Why did you hang up when I said "You better go catch it", after you stated that yes, your refrigerator was running?
Alas, we could have had a long and enjoyable relationship....