"As we age and become closer and more comfortable with one another, it could be that we're more able to express ourselves to each other," said lead study author Kira Birditt, a research fellow at the University of Michigan's Institute for Social Research.
So far, so good. An improvement over time in the ability to communicate should be a precursor to an improvement in the totality of the relationship.
"In other words, it's possible that negativity is a normal aspect of close relationships that include a great deal of daily contact."
Now I'm getting complexed and perfused. In the previous breath Kira Birditt said that over time we get better at expressing ourselves to each other, and in this breath she says that over time we get more negative towards each other. Does this mean that we merely get better at expressing how negatively we view the other person in the relationship?
If that's the case, I'm sure any of the major armed forces training programs (with the probable exception of the US Air Farce) could provide lesons in expressing negativity towards others that would not require literally years to perfect. My limited memory and experience (40+ years ago, 4 Drill Instructors @ MCRD PI) suggest that even the most dull-witted can learn such techniques as only a part of a 6-week program.
Rather than breeding unhappy couples and ill health, the increase in negativity could be a normal part of relationships.
Now I am even more perfused and complexed. More and more negativity is what one should
expect in a relationship?
And to think that I considered it a sign that I ought to get out of the relationship when, one dark night, I realized I could not come up with even 1 reason why I should not shoot her in the head as she lay there in bed next to me. All the money wasted in counseling and therapy. All the lawyers' bills I would not have had to pay. How much money would I have saved if I did not have to pay spousal support as opposed to the "regular" bills? Hmmm?
Guys - at least those of you who have had ex's from hell - please send me their name and last known address (unless it is a cemetary plot). According to this study, you blew your chance at a "normal" relationship and I want to be able to profit from your errors.
And for all of you who are so prone to telling how wonderful your partner is -- all I can say is that you are living in a dream world. You will eventually see that it is all false, and that you should be striving for greater negativity if you too want a normal relationship.
stay safe.
skidmark *takes off chest waders after hosing off male bovine excrement*