Nah. Find the twangiest, most annoying country music you can, and lock the knob off at "11".....
This song would work, my old Army roommate had it on repeat on his stereo for days at a time and I finally keyed the CD while he was gone because I couldn't take it anymore:
Sold (The Grundy County Auction Incident)
(written by Richard Fagan and Robb Royer)
Well, I went down to the Grundy County Auction
Where I saw somethin' I just had to have
My mind told me I should proceed with caution
But my heart said "Go ahead an' make a bid on that!"
(Chorus)
An' I said, hey, pretty lady, won'cha gi'me a sign
I'd give anything to make you mine all mine
I'll do your biddin' an' be at your beckon call
Yeah, I never seen anyone lookin' so fine
Man, I gotta have have her, she's a one-of-a-kind
I'm goin' once, goin' twice,
I'm sold! On the lady in the second row
She's an eight, she's a nine, she's a ten, I know
She's got ruby-red lips, blond hair, blue eyes
An' I'm about to bid my heart good-bye!
Well, the auctioneer was goin' about a mile minute
He was takin' bids an' callin' them out loud
An' I guess I was really gettin' in it
'Cause I just shouted out above the crowd
An' I said, hey, pretty lady, won'cha gi'me a sign
I'd give anything to make you mine all mine
I'll do your biddin' an' be at your beckon call
Yeah, I never seen anyone lookin' so fine
Man, I gotta have have her, she's a one-of-a-kind
I'm goin' once, goin' twice,
I'm sold! On the lady in the long black dress
Well she won my heart, it was no contest
With her ruby-red lips, blond hair, blue eyes
An' I'm about to bid my heart good-bye!
Yeah, we found love on the auction block
An' I hauled her heart away
Now we still love to laugh about
The way we met that day