.Cheese.,
I could swear that cloning is still illegal in the U.S., but you and I could be twin brothers. Your story is practically the same as mine. I'm in my early twenties, shy throughout college, blah blah blah. I've heard the "Are you gay?" jokesters so much that the people who kept asking/joking eventually got tired of joking about it.
For me, it is/was best summed up as a fear of commitment. My mother was married three times, divorced twice, (working on that third divorce) and my father was married twice, divorced twice (finally learned his lesson and will not marry again). So, I think it needless to explain my theory that there is some gene that causes relationship failure, and it is a dominant trait in my bloodline.
Or at least, I thought that for a long time. Not so much now.
How did I get out of my dilemma? Well, I'm not quite in the clear, honestly. I still have a great fear of asking women on dates, and oddly enough, the fear is that they will say yes. At that point, I ask "****, now what?" I also have never scheduled a second date.
Alcohol. . . seriously.
But that can backfire, and I too would advise seeing a doctor, before going that route. Yet, even my closest friends say I am the life of the party when I'm a bit buzzed, and all my inhibitions go on sabbatical when I put my liver to work (asking women to go on dates is no problem at such a point, but remembering conversations can be challenging). Most importantly, I do not over-analyze in such a condition, which I think is a big obstacle. Fortunately, I am not an angry drunk (at least, no indications thus far). I also refuse to drink in solitude, for fear of it leading to alcoholism (relationship failure isn't the only gene that runs in my family
). It is a tool to be used with great care.
But, there is another option, and this one actually is harder to accomplish.
Get FED UP! . . . seriously. You've heard the "Don't wallow in your self pity" argument, I'm sure. Well, here it is again:
I'm finally disgusted with being alone, and I'm faced with the stark realization that it is possible I will be alone indefinitely, if I continue on this course. Some people reach this point later than others, and some may never reach it at all. You have to essentially make yourself angry about your situation,
but be sure to harness that anger and mold it into something positive (no, beating your dog will not help you get a girlfriend, nor will smashing things to pieces).