Author Topic: Babylon Bee  (Read 88366 times)

Ben

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #250 on: August 15, 2023, 08:43:45 PM »
You may have to explain that one to me.

Brian Stelter, AKA Mr Potatohead. Idaho, AKA potatoho.
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WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #251 on: August 15, 2023, 09:10:09 PM »
Brian Stelter, AKA Mr Potatohead. Idaho, AKA potatoho.

Thanks  :rofl:
"Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us".
- Calvin and Hobbes

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
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WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #252 on: August 29, 2023, 05:59:34 PM »
Liberal Dies On Toilet While Awaiting CDC Guidance On How To Wipe
https://babylonbee.com/news/liberal-dies-on-toilet-while-awaiting-cdc-guidance-on-how-to-wipe
"Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us".
- Calvin and Hobbes

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

Angel Eyes

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"... and now I want to hand it over to the president of Ukraine who has as much courage as he has determination.  Ladies and gentlemen, President Putin."
                          - Joe Biden, July 11, 2024

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #254 on: September 14, 2023, 11:11:31 AM »
Democrats Scramble To Find Replacement For Retiring Mitt Romney
https://babylonbee.com/news/democrats-scramble-to-find-replacement-for-retiring-mitt-romney
"Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us".
- Calvin and Hobbes

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #255 on: September 14, 2023, 11:12:33 AM »
Audience Cheers As Apple Unveils First Carbon-Neutral Uyghur Slave Camp
https://babylonbee.com/news/audience-cheers-as-apple-unveils-first-carbon-neutral-uyghur-slave-camp
"Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us".
- Calvin and Hobbes

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #256 on: September 27, 2023, 06:53:31 PM »
Philadelphia Shoe Stores, Liquor Stores, Electronics Stores Looted By Starving People Desperately Looking For Bread
https://babylonbee.com/news/philadelphia-shoe-stores-liquor-stores-electronics-stores-looted-by-starving-people-desperately-looking-for-bread

"Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us".
- Calvin and Hobbes

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #257 on: September 27, 2023, 06:54:22 PM »
Looters Completely Ignore Foot Locker Referee Blowing His Whistle
https://babylonbee.com/news/looters-completely-ignore-foot-locker-referee-blowing-his-whistle
"Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us".
- Calvin and Hobbes

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

Angel Eyes

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"... and now I want to hand it over to the president of Ukraine who has as much courage as he has determination.  Ladies and gentlemen, President Putin."
                          - Joe Biden, July 11, 2024

Hawkmoon

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100% Politically Incorrect by Design

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #260 on: September 30, 2023, 08:43:18 AM »
Wife Frustrated That Husband Doesn't Realize She Wants Him To Be Quiet And Also Talk To Her And Also Leave Her Alone And Also Come Talk To Her
https://babylonbee.com/news/wife-frustrated-that-husband-doesnt-realize-she-wants-him-to-be-quiet-and-also-talk-to-her-and-also-leave-her-alone-and-also-come-talk-to-her
"Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us".
- Calvin and Hobbes

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

Hawkmoon

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #261 on: September 30, 2023, 06:30:33 PM »
Wife Frustrated That Husband Doesn't Realize She Wants Him To Be Quiet And Also Talk To Her And Also Leave Her Alone And Also Come Talk To Her
https://babylonbee.com/news/wife-frustrated-that-husband-doesnt-realize-she-wants-him-to-be-quiet-and-also-talk-to-her-and-also-leave-her-alone-and-also-come-talk-to-her

I have been that guy. Bit of a disagreement. Fiancee asked what I thought, then immediately followed with, "Never mind. I know what you'e going to say and I don't want to hear it."

So I left the room and went to bed. Half an hour later she woke me up and chewed me out for not communicating.
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100% Politically Incorrect by Design

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #262 on: October 05, 2023, 10:41:59 AM »
Crew Moving Pelosi Out Of Office Crushed To Death By Empty Wine Bottles
https://babylonbee.com/news/crew-moving-pelosi-out-of-office-crushed-to-death-by-empty-wine-bottles
"Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us".
- Calvin and Hobbes

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

K Frame

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #263 on: October 05, 2023, 10:46:33 AM »
Crew Moving Pelosi Out Of Office Crushed To Death By Empty Wine Bottles
https://babylonbee.com/news/crew-moving-pelosi-out-of-office-crushed-to-death-by-empty-wine-bottles

What? Not buried under an avalanche of empty super premium ice cream cartons?
Carbon Monoxide, sucking the life out of idiots, 'tards, and fools since man tamed fire.

zxcvbob

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #264 on: October 05, 2023, 12:17:25 PM »
What? Not buried under an avalanche of empty super premium ice cream cartons?

That wouldn't be all that bad, so the joke wouldn't work.  Sticky, maybe.  Wine bottles are heavy.
"It's good, though..."

K Frame

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #265 on: October 05, 2023, 12:59:18 PM »
I was thinking specifically of that interview she did in the early days of the COVID shut downs where she showed that huge freezer just stuffed full of super premium ice cream at a time when tens of thousands were losing their jobs and worrying about how they were simply going to eat, let alone snack.
Carbon Monoxide, sucking the life out of idiots, 'tards, and fools since man tamed fire.

zxcvbob

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #266 on: October 05, 2023, 01:01:53 PM »
I was thinking specifically of that interview she did in the early days of the COVID shut downs where she showed that huge freezer just stuffed full of super premium ice cream at a time when tens of thousands were losing their jobs and worrying about how they were simply going to eat, let alone snack.

:)  I knew the reference, just saying it wouldn't work in the joke without a *lot* more suspension of disbelief.
"It's good, though..."

K Frame

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #267 on: October 05, 2023, 01:05:32 PM »
And dying in a crush of wine bottles is perfectly believable.

O....... K.......


 :rofl:
Carbon Monoxide, sucking the life out of idiots, 'tards, and fools since man tamed fire.

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #268 on: October 12, 2023, 05:58:54 PM »
"Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us".
- Calvin and Hobbes

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #269 on: October 12, 2023, 06:00:49 PM »
^^^^^
I intentionally didn't post that in a certain other thread so as to not give away the joke.
"Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us".
- Calvin and Hobbes

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #270 on: October 12, 2023, 06:03:14 PM »
Powerball Winner Revealed To Be Hispanic California Resident Volodymyro Zelensko
https://babylonbee.com/news/powerball-winner-revealed-to-be-hispanic-california-resident-vladimiro-zelensko
"Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us".
- Calvin and Hobbes

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #271 on: October 12, 2023, 06:04:10 PM »
Dodgers Wondering If They Should Have Spent More Time Training For Playoffs And Less Time Honoring Satanic Drag Nuns
https://babylonbee.com/news/dodgers-wondering-if-they-should-have-spent-more-time-training-for-playoffs-and-less-time-honoring-satan-drag-nuns
"Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us".
- Calvin and Hobbes

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi

230RN

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #272 on: October 12, 2023, 07:30:38 PM »
Hasn't the Sacramento Bee newspaper taken enough abuse by these cruel parodies by now?  Underdog-lovers unite in protest!

         

I'll have to get my bullhorn out of storage to lead a mostly peaceful riot over this terrible injustice!

I hope the battery's still good.

Terry,  "One Of The People," 230RN


WLJ

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Re: Babylon Bee
« Reply #274 on: October 25, 2023, 04:30:37 PM »
Gavin Newsom Visits Xi Jinping To Get More Ideas On How To Run California
https://babylonbee.com/news/gavin-newsom-visits-xi-jinping-to-get-more-ideas-on-how-to-run-california
"Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us".
- Calvin and Hobbes

“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
― George Orwell, 1984

“Those who believe without reason cannot be convinced by reason.”
― James Randi