R.I.P. Scout26
Several scientists on the panel agreed wholeheartedly with Gore’s assessment. “The evidence is irrefutable,” said Dr. Sufjan Swami of Johns Hopkins University. “To not buy Al’s books and movies at a time like this is tantamount to treason.” Various experts on the panel all agreed that it was time for all countries and communities to come together and commit all of their resources to the purchase of Al Gore’s books and movies.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Babylon_BeeI don't see any mention of Frank Fleming.
I can just see Gavin Newsom reading this and thinking, "Hmmm . . . ."https://babylonbee.com/news/new-law-would-force-drivers-to-listen-to-greta-thunberg-lecture-before-filling-up-their-cars
I would normally insert an LOL emoticon here, but sadly, it is too close to potential reality. Much like with pollution controls, CA could insist all cars must come with a screeching Greta Thunberg recording that runs every time you start your car. The transmission is locked out until the recording finishes.
The Cali DMV may require you to listen to a Greta sermon before leaving you alone.
This has the potential to become a very long thread:https://babylonbee.com/news/radical-far-right-library-just-has-books-no-drag-queens
"After much deliberation, consultation, and prayer to Moloch, I have decided that I will seek a second term," she said to a crowd gathered at a local Wendy's restaurant. "I feel I haven't accomplished everything I wanted to in my first term, and I really need a full eight years to implement my final solution to all of America's problems."
"Orange man bad! Orange man bad!" she chanted at one heckler, though the heckler turned out to be a Wendy's worker asking if she wanted the Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger 4 for $4 or the chicken sandwich one.Aides then gently ushered her back onto the bus to take her back to Bright Sunrise Home For Seniors
Molly Harper patted their daughter on the back. "What your father's trying to say is that, well, the birds and the bees... and, well, let's not leave out the birds who want to become bees, and the bees who identify as birds! Maybe we'd better start there and then we'll circle back to the cisspecies birds and bees."
16 hours later, they'd gotten a good halfway through "the talk" and decided to leave the discussion about birds having surgeries when they're still hatchlings to become bees until the following day.
As Trump made the announcement, protesters gathered outside the White House to scream at the sky. Again.
https://babylonbee.com/news/was-that-video-of-trump-shooting-various-news-outlets-in-the-face-doctored-an-in-depth-analysisWas That Video Of Trump Shooting His Political Foes In The Face Doctored? An In-Depth Analysis
The woman drew on her guaranteed free speech rights to state that "this government is like something out of a totalitarian dystopia," as police stood by guarding to ensure her and her fellow protesters' right to protest was protected.
At publishing time, she told reporters she would love to draw further comparisons to dystopian fiction novels other than The Handmaid's Tale, but she hadn't read any.
The device can also be set to Evangelist Mode, which explains the “Romans Road” to visitors and leads food delivery drivers in the sinner’s prayer before payment is made.
“I can no longer in good conscience turn a blind eye to the oppressive systemic abuse of power that excludes bits who don’t identify as either ‘1’ or ‘0’,” he said. “To demand that a marginalized digital bit identify with a number foisted upon it by a harmful system created by white males is extremely problematic. Code is a social construct.”
Though this means no money for California for now, Trump has earmarked some money for California to help any pro-democracy movement within the state. So far none has emerged.
https://babylonbee.com/news/trump-vows-to-cut-foreign-aid-to-californiaTrump Vows To Cut Foreign Aid To California
“The AHA frequently employs phrases such as, ‘reducing trans fat in your diet helps reduce risk of heart disease,’ ‘trans fats raise your bad (LDL) cholesterol levels and lower your good (HDL) cholesterol levels,’ ‘eating trans fats increases your risk of developing heart disease and stroke, and is also associated with a higher risk of developing type 2 diabetes,’ an ACLU spokesman explained. “Their nutritional guidelines are blatantly transphobic.”
